13
I
lie in my bed, a whole film is about my thoughts. Nothing is more 100% clear.
This is my fault, by me, Thomas is dead, I can only think. I get up and walk to
the bathroom. I can‘t look in the mirror, I don’t want to see myself. I open a
cupboard and pick up my mother's sleeping pills, I open the jar and throw some
pills in my hand. At one time I put them in my mouth.
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